Was your heart pumping wildly too when Connor (Matthew McConaughey) was holding up the wedding cake with one hand....and the beautifully designed (probably cost as much as a Chanel's white caviar leather purse) four tier wedding cake went SPLAT!
The movie 1. portrays women as needy cheap sluts 2. gives false hope to all women with jerk boyfriends, who all secretly hope their men will sudden have an "epiphany" and "change" 3. Damn, I grew up watching Lacey Chabert and she is already getting married?
Let's clarify my points:
1.) Women as needy cheap sluts - Two of the three bridesmaids slept with Connor, and the last girl feels left out i.e. (Am-I-not-pretty-enough-for-you-to-bang) which would make it three out of three bridesmaids having sexual relations with homeboy. I mean really, Congress only needs 2/3 votes to override the President, 100% is not necessary but of course homeboy wants to be perfect. The bridesmaids seem unfazed about sharing the same man at one point, hell, one of them had a wild night with his brother too.
I don't know about you, but I wouldn't even bat an eyelash at my girlfriend's sloppy seconds, even if he was a cross between Taylor Lauter's young newly sculpted body, the face of Zeus, the intelligence of Jason Bourne and the humor of Jimmy Fallon. (Ok, maybe a little eyelash flirting) but that's where I draw the line honey.
2.) On to numero dos, men like Connor - selfish, egoistic, self-center, conceited, you get the point...will NOT wake up on the RIGHT side of the bed and believe in true L-O-V-E. As much as I grew up with an optimistic view on fairy tale love, Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty. Princes in those stories don't translate into the real world.
I hope women don't sit at home pondering on whether their real life Connor will one day wake up and smell the coffee.
3.) I admit I wasn't much of a "Party of Five" fan I
So I started talking about the wedding cake, hours upon hours of handmade designs, months of planning, and probably designed by Colette Peters smashing onto the floor. Oh. The. Humanity.
To save myself from 1. being a cheap needy slut 2. hallucinating about men "finally" coming around and 3. one day becoming a blubbering bridezilla I rewarded myself a simple light sponge cake, filled with fresh strawberries, the lightest whipped frosting and inscribed my one true love's name who will adore me more each day and never leave me
my lovable (sometimes a punk) 8 pound Pom-Chi.